musings, ramblings, observations, all blown out of proportion and mistaken for insights


Wednesday, March 23, 2011

guilt

Standing in the hallway of your home,
in the corridor of your cave,
in the godliness of your gaze,
you leave me in a daze.

So when I bring myself to speak
and describe the state I'm in
I can bring myself think
and contemplate my sin

you've got me down on my knees
you've got me talking to god -
I ain't never been a believer before
and I ain't never seen the light

and when the light shines
I'll be sleeping through my sickness
And when my eyes have widened
I'll be staring at the darkness

I'll stagger like a drunken bum
through the labyrinths of my life
or I'll sit and still and stare and disappear
to a place devoid of fear

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Sweet Sister Ray

There is something romantic to me about degradation and self-destruction so it only makes sense that Sister Ray by The Velvet Underground stands as one of the greatest works of noise-poetry ever conceived and recorded. Coming out of Lou Reed's methedrine laced street smarts and John Cale's training as a deconstructor of musical forms Sister Ray stands as the apocalyptic east coast counterpart to the Grateful Dead's Dark Star.

FINISH THIS WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE SCHOOLWORK YOU FOOL!!!!!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

stagnation

I have little to say these days. My mood has been nihilistic and uninspired; I guess you can say my life isn't at the point where I'm burning with passion and excitement.

Living in this culture that fuels rampant greed and narcissism depresses me and I can see how it's leaking into my own self. I don't have any great ideas on how to fix it, in fact I'm completely clueless and nothing that's been proposing to me has warranted much other than laughter from me. My idealism of the past has been replaced by a lazy and jaded attitude that sees little hopes in dreams of a utopian future.

A utopian future doesn't even interest me anymore - such a thing seems more dull and oppressive than the capitalist tyranny we have now - no suffering? no incentive to rebel? Suffering and rebellion are essential to all human creativity that isn't pure scientific and technological progress. A world without suffering sounds desolate and simply boring, a greyscale pleasure prison.

The angst and alienation I feel is typical, I realize this. I don't have any delusions of individuality and uniqueness like I used to, I'm just another anonymous voice helpless whispering into the collective information network of the human race.

what my computer speakers are currently spewing:

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i'm made of cells and I have a functioning brain